Thursday, February 25, 2010

How's your yarn ball?

I bet no one has ever asked you how your yarn ball was before. On the way to Bible Study this morning, I was wrestling with my thoughts and feelings over some financial issues we are figuring out. I asked myself if I was in knots. The answer came from the Lord as a picture of a mass of tangled crochet yarn that lives in the bottom of a box in my sewing room. We are like a skein of yarn.

I don't know if you have ever worked with yarn, but it is almost impossible to use an entire skein without getting a knot or kink in it. Sometimes it is easy to loosen, sometimes you have to take the whole thing a part and roll it back into a ball. If you have children or a cat, you likely have to deal with even more knots and tangles. How like our lives this is, when we try to live our lives our own way when end up a big tangled mass of kinks and knots. We work on one area for a while and make some progress only to come upon another area of trouble. Sometimes there are big knots that take a long time to work out, sometimes kinks that are easier to work through. However, it is impossible for us to work them out completely, only the Lord can do that.

So, for today I am asking the Lord to take care of my yarn ball; to make me useful for His kingdom and that He would work me into a beautiful tapestry. I know that I will probably manage to get tangled up and need more knots worked out and I am thankful that He is faithful to do it!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Learning Not To Dangle

"There are days when I feel the best of me are ready to begin. "
I haven't thought of that song in so long. I have just completed week 3 of Beth Moore's Bible study "Breaking Free." I, as usual, arrogantly tried to assume the Holy Spirit's role to try and figure out what areas I need to work on. I love the Lord. I trust Him. Why then do I continue to struggle with doing what He says? I am learning that it is because I am a dangler. I give things to the Lord and then I hold on so tightly that my feet are not touching the ground. I am dangling, peace beneath my feet if I would just let go.

Lately, I have had been dealing with 3 main issues with varying degrees of success:
1. God's will for the life of my family. I am quite certain He is ready to move us to a new stage in our life. I don't care where, you know that is what most of us would have trouble with., I have never really struggled with where. When? Now here is my issue. I am learning to let that go and it feels great! I know it is coming and when it does I'll be ready. For now, I am not dangling on this one anymore.
2. Our finances. Man have we flubbed that up several times. I now have Dave Ramsey in my ear whispering 'do you NEED it.' We are a year out from using credit cards. Oh we are still paying for them, we just don't use them. I would like to say that we would have made a huge dent in our debt by now if Jason hadn't lost one of his jobs. However, I don't think that would be the case. I don't think we were REALLY learning our lesson (DANGLING) until we had to fully rely on God for our daily bread. What a blessing that is!! It is stinking hard, but so totally worth it. I only want to be tied to the LOrd. I do not want to be tied to credit cards, or banks, or Heaven forbid the government! Anyway, this area is still a work in progress, but we are making strides, like a wobbly, baby gazelle.
3. Now for the area that I think I might still be grasping at, motherhood. Being a mother is all I have ever really wanted to be. Now I have three beautiful gifts from God. What do I do with them? Satan has a field day with me here, but I have news for him: that is coming to an end!!! I have struggled with how to discipline my very smart, VERY strong willed children. It is so easy for me to feel like a failure when they choose poorly. I hate punishing them at the same time I shudder to think about not punishing them. I love them so much and I am learning to let go and realize that loving them, praying for them, and teaching them about the Lord is the very best things I can do for them. Boy do I have a long way to go on this one, even now as I am typing I am standing on my tiptoes holding on for dear life.

So I will leave you to get "On My Knees."

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

New Family pictures

John is 6.

Evie is 2.5

THis is Liliane Grace. She is our "new" addition at 10 months. WAYYYY behind on the blog!

Lent 2010

So I have been trying to decide what to do about Lent this year. In the past I have given up French Fries (lame) or fast food (also lame) or even tv. We hardly ever eat fast food now, so that is no good - not that it ever was. I am fairly limited in my tv time so that is out.
However, I have been studying Beth Moore's Breaking Free at church and I think I finally know what I am going to do. I am going to add blogging for Lent and maybe after. THis is your warning. Ha!